seventeen days of lola

I have tried to write this post about twenty seven times in the past seventeen days.  Every time I sit down to write I find I am called to feed, or change a diaper, or would rather be snuggling or realize I should probably take advantage of the seldom opportunity to catch a few z's.  I have finally decided to take a few minutes (despite the exhaustion and need of a shower and the laundry pile that I think stands taller than me now) to share a little bit of our life the past couple of weeks, because my friends, it has been so lovely.  I am finally a mama...and I love it.  I think I was meant for this.  I never in a million years imagined I could love this little peanut so incredibly much.  All she does is eat (at all hours of the night), sleep, poop, and make the most adorable little noises you could imagine.  Sometimes she cries, but like most mamas I will sugarcoat it and tell you it's hardly ever and when she does it's pretty darn cute.  She also makes faces like this a lot, and I love this too.

Some people have asked to hear the birth story so I will give you the short version because It was a pretty long 25 hours of labor.  After 41 weeks and 4 days of hosting this little one in my belly, it was time.  We headed for the hospital to be induced on 11/11/11 which we thought would be a pretty awesome birthday.  We arrived at 8am, they hooked me up to all kinds of monitors (see below), gave me a pill, and before we knew it the contractions began one minute apart.  Little ones that quickly turned to big ones that quickly tuned to lots of pain and tears.  At about 9:30am two nurses ran in the room and started an IV and oxygen.  We thought maybe this was normal, or rather hoped this was normal?  She then explained that little Lola's heart rate had decelerated and we needed to get it up stat.  Fear overcame me.  Why did it happen?  Maybe we shouldn't have been induced.  Did we make the wrong decision?  All of these thoughts were racing through my mind.  The nurse had me change positions and she quickly recovered.  Thank God.

The contractions continued, we had another incident with her heart rate dropping (and quickly recovering), a lot more contractions (ouch), an epidural (thank you, Jesus), attempted sleep (unsuccessful), and another heart rate deceleration (ahhh!).  After this drop the doc said we would have to have a c-section if it happened again.  Daylight was upon us and it had been twenty four long hours of labor.  I had progressed to (almost) 9cm from 3cm in an hour or so (woo!).  This meant it was almost time to push!  In about thirty minutes I let the doc know I was ready and the pushing began, for about thirty seconds when Lola's little heart rate dropped again.  I was heartbroken, scared, and kiiind of freaking out.  I knew a c-section was coming.  Immediately the nurse dramatically ripped a chord out of one of my machines which triggered about twelve (okay maybe more like five, but it seemed like twelve) nurses, a doctor, and an anaesthesiologist in to prep for surgery.  A nurse threw some scrubs at Brian, he had a panicked, confused look on his face with which the nurse responded: "You need to make yourself look like me, GO!"  And we were off.

The OR seemed so medical and white and sterile (which I guess is good) and just not what I imagined for the birth of our baby.  Brian stood by me the whole time and I squeezed his hand, really...really hard.  Within a matter of minutes I saw this little bundle and I completely forgot the past twenty five hours.  All of it.  All that mattered was this new little life, this little baby girl that was all ours.

Turns out Lola's cord was a lot shorter than it needed to be.  Whether we would have been induced or not a c-section would have been necessary.  Little Lola May was born on 11/12/11, 7lbs 7oz, 21 and one quarter inches and is pretty much perfection.  Brian has been the most amazing daddy already.  Nurses even commented a few times about how involved he was and how well we work as a team.  I have to brag a little, I mean look at him.:)

How cute are they? 

Welp, there you have it.  Seventeen days of this little pumpkin have been bliss.  I am one smitten mama and wifey.  More to come soon, until then, happy holidays to you and yours!

Lady in Waiting

                                                             41 weeks, come on baby!

Our little peanut was due one week ago today.  This was not my plan.  In the past I have never been much of a planner.  I am more of a fly by the seat of your pants kind of a girl, somewhat of a procrastinator if you will, and prefer spontaneity to a plan or boring routine.  But this mama business has thrown me for a loop.  All of a sudden I feel the need to plan every. little. detail.  We had the nursery ready months ago, I’ve read books upon books about pregnancy, sleep schedules, nursing and the like.  I also just knew I was going to be one of those mamas who went into labor at 38ish weeks.  I had talked to my girlfriends about what got them into labor and had all the right tricks up my sleeve.  God on the other hand, had a different plan in mind.  I should have known.

Instead, my 38ish week plan came and went, weeks 39 and 40 rolled right on by, and today I got a lovely little announcement from my pregnancy app that I am 41 weeks today.  Oh the frustration.  But I know God has been working on my heart through all of this, gently whispering “patience” and “peace.”  And I have not wanted to hear it.  I think a bit of me has actually started to resent him for it.  I knew this wasn’t good.  So today I sat down for some quiet time with Jesus and rested in his peace.  I gave all my worries and fears to him because he has called me to.  Just thinking about inductions and C-sections can get a girl a little worked up (I know, I know, I shouldn't be thinking about that yet).  But he wants me to rely on him and trust that he has a plan, and I know he does.  A prefect plan.

Cast all of your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Whatever day this little girl decides to make her debut will be beautiful and perfect and just right.  Looks like she is deciding to take after her mama and be fashionably late and a little stubborn.  In the mean time I am going to soak up every moment of freedom and time with my husband I can.  We are going to enjoy the little things like picking up and going whenever we want, dinner out, not being (too) exhausted, late night talks in bed and being just the two of us before there are three.